Yea, I know.
It's always something.
The last few months have been a literal lifetime frfr. Initially, my blog disappearancehad everything to do with being busy. Extremely busy. Working full time at the studio by myself AND being a full time parent was too much for anyone's plate. I tried. Day after day cooking meals, driving miles back and forth, meetings, cleaning, clients, wiping toddler butt...I was already stressed out to the max. To me at the time it was worth it because I was doing my due diligence in helping my family fulfill our dream of financial freedom. It was costing me more than every dollar I was making.
By the time August rolled around I could barely stay clear headed; always exhausted to the point of constant mental fog. I was severely dehydrated and had developed daily migraines and constant diarrhea. I went from working 8 hours at the studio daily to barely waltzing in twice a week. Business was slower than expected once the university students came back. The money trickling in was hardly worth what it was costing me. I didn't have enough to hire help or child care. Then...there was the severe panic attack.
I was rushed to the ER with a laundry list of symptoms. I was having a panic attack so intense it was threatening the new life I'd just found out I had. Wow! Pregnant?! Me? I became overwhelmed with hope and fear at the same damn time. I prayed for the baby's safety. I prayed for my health and healing. I was released with a ton of meds and prescribed bed rest for a week.
It was in the hospital where I made the final decision to close the store. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make. I told my husband through tears many times over the next few weeks as we moved out of the studio, it was like giving up one child for the other.
Honestly, It took many weeks to get my mind back right. To give my nerves and my heart time to heal. It wasn't until about two weeks ago when I had the idea to share my pregnancy journey with my followers. Maybe someone out there can relate to my story: a full time wife and mother working her ass off to help make this life something better for her kids, a plus size mom considered healthy and high risk at the same time, a woman who just wants the best for her family.
I've started a vlog this past week called Pretty, Plus + Pregnant. ( I was going to call it Big Black and Pregnant but...nah.lbs) I'll be sharing daily vlogs, workouts, recipes, and doc visits with you along with the standard beauty tutorials and reviews. I hope you share your stories with me. The idea is to create my own little Plus Mom community where we share and support each other through hard times, good times, fears and victories!
Although the decision to close the studio for a while and go back to offering mobile services was an extremely difficult one, it was the best one. I already feel better, have a lot less stress and actually enjoy my time with my son and my work. The baby is excelling now too! Growing like a weed and I couldn't be more content, as you will see in the video- the first installment of this new blog/vlog series.
I love y'all and appreciate you more than you know. Stay blessed. Stay beautiful. -T
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